Serenity as a life motto: Who wants to win, must learn to lose


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Text comes from: Gelassen gewinnen: Ab jetzt reitest du den Affen! (2014) by Prof. Dr. Martin Christian Morgenstern, published by BusinessVillage Verlag, Reprints by friendly permission of the publisher.
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How focused and how well we behave in the situations of life depends on two factors: the I-2 and our current form. Serenity as a life motto: Who wants to win, must learn to lose win-loose


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Dr. Martin Christian Morgenstern 82Dr. Martin Christian Morgenstern is a behavioral scientist and evolutionary psychologist.

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We are just as good as our I-2

The first factor is that we can always be as good as we have trained our I-2. For example, if we have never learned to drive around the curve with a car on a rainy road, then we can never carry out this process in a controlled way. Conversely, if we have learned it, we can do so only within certain limits.

For example, in a car race we can only drive times that correspond to our training condition. If we go beyond that and, for example, drive into the curve even faster than we have learned in practice, there is a high risk of slipping out. Then our brain reacts on the level Ich-2 with a stress reaction because of possible loss of control.

Our current form is an important factor

The second factor for control at the moment is our current form. We permanently fluctuate in the performance of our physical and mental system. We do not just vary within one day. We also vary within week and month rhythms.

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You may also have noticed that top athletes are at the top of the table for a while and then descend again for a time slot until they may rise again. You also often hear that presenters are saying that an athlete is currently in good or bad shape.

The more we want something, the worse we become

We can only be as good in situations of life as we have learned and what our present form allows at the moment. The more we now try to correct this state upwards, the more we confuse the entire system through our intervention in the routines of Ich-2. So if we really want to, we are usually not better, but worse. That is why we are usually successful when we let ourselves be made.

The easiest way to do this is in situations that are not that important to us. Conversely, the more important things become to us, the higher the risk of gaining the will to win. The more you succeed in the future to face the everyday situations with the willingness to not necessarily want to win, the better you will be.

The better you can lose, the more you win

And the better you are, the more you control the moment and again your future. The easiest way to let go is to let go of absolute worst-case scenarios in most standard situations.

The better your Ich-2 can handle losing, the more you will win in the future, paradoxically. I would like to describe this with a small example. Imagine, every time you meet your neighbor on the street, you feel a strong stress reaction. Now that you have read this book and have decided to practice serenity every day, apply a technique the next time you meet.

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Adapt our Stone Age brain to modern challenges

This may not give you complete peace of mind, but will noticeably reduce the stress response. If you do this regularly for a while, at some point you will hardly feel any reaction to the encounter with your neighbor.

Of course, you will still not love him for that! But that's not the point. It is basically about adapting our brain, which was trimmed to Stone Age survival, to modern challenges.

The more relaxed our reaction, the better the result

And the challenges of today's life are not solved by fist or club in most cases. The more relaxed we enter into the challenging situation of our lives, the more effective and thoughtful we will be.

In addition, we have the advantage that we simply consume less energy and accordingly have less recreation needs. We remain fresher and more concentrated throughout the day.

Challenges daily

That's why at this point you write down your ears once again that serenity takes a lifetime of daily practice. There will always be people or situations that challenge us.

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And from now on, we will accept this challenge sportily and try to build up the highest degree of serenity at this moment. And no exercise is free, because our nerve cells on the level Ich-2 will definitely remember that next time. And the longer we walk this path, the more reason we develop in standard situations without having to use any technique.


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  1. Katharina Daniels

    From dialectics in thought and action:

  2. Elke Overhage

    #Legity as a life motto: If you want to win, you must learn to lose.

  3. kexpa

    Unfortunately, many are not relaxed at the present time, so it's no wonder. Always looking for something, be it the right job, the right positioning, the right people, the right values ​​or characteristics. Exactly it always has to be right, the fear of mistakes and wrong decisions dominates so often. The article nudges us, makes us think. We really relax and do not bother with our mistakes and throw ourselves off track. Yes, it is completely OK not even to win, the only way we grow and become winners.

    • Simone Janson

      Hello Mrs. Skubella,
      you're right. On the other hand, there is a large amount of people trying to duplicate their insecurity with what appears to be serenity and coolness, which is also tedious for others.

  4. Karriereexperten.com

    Long live the #

  5. Competencepartner

    Serenity as a life motto - Part 4: Who wants to win, must learn to lose: How to concentrate ... # Profession #Education

  6. Anett Saddler

    RT @SimoneJanson: Serenity as a life motto - Part 4: Who wants to win, must learn to lose -

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