Reconciliation as a source of inner strength
Joie de vivre can only arise when we have made peace with our past: I have drawn this knowledge from my own experience:
Through an overpowering father, the personal threat situation under the sign of RAF terrorism and the suicide of my mother, I have recognized: To find oneself and go new ways of life, reconciliation is a source of inner strength. Here are the 5 steps on the way to inner peace at a glance:
1. Step: What is my concern?
To take the first step, one must know where this step should go. As a useful remedy, I recommend "mental reduction", which means: concentration on the essentials. The question is:
- What is it about me?
- What kind of energy do I want to edit?
In seminars, I lead the participants to formulate a concise and precise sentence. Such a sentence starts best with a simple "I want ..." and ends with a concrete goal.
Because only when the painful "topic" is named exactly and concretely, the work can begin at the root of the problem. So I start a path of reconciliation with the concern: "I want peace with my experiences of violence and terrorism."
2. Step: Everything on the table
The second step on the road to reconciliation is "putting everything on the table", which means paying close attention to all the thoughts, facts, memories and feelings - without shame and embarrassment.
I know from personal experience that this step is not always easy: sometimes we feel ashamed of our feelings and do not want to admit it. Precisely because we are masters in repression, this step is especially important. To really "unpack" all feelings, I recommend in my seminars to write a letter to yourself: Here you can write everything that connects you to your painful experience - in my case, it was about my terrorism experiences and related isolation.
Such letters are salutary because they offer us a platform to find ourselves in peace and seclusion and no longer hide from ourselves. From this letter then the key messages - the power-hungry - can be filtered out, such as loneliness, inner speechlessness, powerlessness.
3. Step: Experience the energy transition
For every feeling there is a counter-feeling and the energy can run amazingly fast from one pole to another. Therefore, in the third step on the path of reconciliation, it is about finding a positive counterpart to the power-hungry from the second step. To do this, we first have to identify it, clearly and unequivocally.
In the video seminar Walter Kohl explains step by step how to find the right counterpart to his negative feelings. So, out of loneliness, connectedness, impotence, self-responsibility, and inner speechlessness made me "able to say it." And from the old energy "injustice" he found the right counterpart "acceptance and trust".
4. Step: My peace treaty with myself
In the fourth step, the decision is made to get out of the old inner conflict once and for all. And this is done through a "peace treaty in itself": In this contract, one declares his independence from the old situation, which has caused pain. It is important that the text does not contain blame or insults.
We need not and should not wait for the other parties, for we create our new inner peace out of our own sovereignty. Reconciliation and inner peace know no other claims to others. My peace treaty is in excerpts: "Today I accept the years of terrorism as part of my life. It is not a beautiful part, but a part that is there, as well as other parts. (...) I have acknowledged my old feelings. They are true. But I have learned to deal with these feelings, to change them. I'm no longer at their mercy. Today I can say that the terror time did not break me, but hurt me. (...) These injuries were deep, but they healed and healed through the path of reconciliation. Some scars heal, but that's okay. Even old dogs often have scars, but they are still beautiful and adorable. "
Anyone who has taken the path of reconciliation knows that reconciliation is free. It renews man. It releases unimagined powers. Living the inner peace in everyday life is the actual touchstone. "And examinations will come, that's for sure."
The fifth step leads from the past into the future. It is a symbol of a philosophy of life in which the search for inner and outer peace is the focus.
For the happy live academy, an e-coaching platform of the publisher Herder, I have developed a video seminar from 6 lessons with a total of 11 videos, which the participant at intervals of seven days per eMail receives and thus can solve personal blockades step by step. In addition to the videos, the seminar participant will receive written summaries and exercises in order to deepen the content and apply it to the personal situation.
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