Take off your specialist glasses
Nobody likes a conversation partner, who does not pay any attention, simply pushes the interests and suggestions of his counterpart aside, talks him into the ground.
But what is the reason? We always consider ourselves the center of our (small) universe. Egocentrism and selfishness are high on our agenda in our society.
The winner takes it all?
When it comes to our own interests, we try to implement them with many means. Even if my opponent remains on the line, pulls the short one, I talk him into the ground, no consideration can be taken.
"The winner takes is all" ... In the short term we can achieve quite good results with this behavior. In the longer term, we will lose out: Who wants to talk to someone who is only interested in himself?
5 tips for true age centering
Even if the admittedly admittedly in some talkshows has a very publicly effective method. With the following tips, age centering is quite simple:
1, "The biggest misconception about communication is the assumption that it has taken place".
How often do we pass each other? Special expressions, technical terms, insider knowledge are a guarantee for this. It is a great challenge for many people. Especially for those who confuse specialist and social skills.
Once again, communication is created by the recipient. Does your interlocutor share your specialization? No? Then down with the glasses, away with fixed value and action patterns, away with the special knowledge - only temporarily, of course.
2. Give wishes of other space
Even if these wishes are contrary to your own. To give space does not automatically give right, does not mean to accept for a long time. But listen and try to understand. Put yourself into your partner.
- What does he want to tell me about this statement?
- How can I support him?
- How does he see the situation?
What brings you all this? Through understanding and understanding, it is easier and easier to take into account the interests and desires of the other, where it makes the least effort. You'll see it's worth it!
3. Make a point: often times the flap hold
Monologues are often self-runners. It is literally warm, it is often difficult to stop the flow of speech. Pay attention to your counterpart: Body language is worth a thousand words. With a little practice you will easily recognize tiredness, boredom, lack of interest in others.
And, most of the time, this is not up to your uninvolved conversation partner, that's up to you! Include your opponent in the conversation, ask questions, be silent. Because they do not need to be the opposite. You can also conduct self-talks in the quiet chamber.
4. Signal understanding
Not only is the knowledge of the situation of the other being asked here, but the willingness to understand the thoughts and emotions of the counterpart, and the ability to really understand them.
You can train it. Put yourself in the position of your partner and try to recognize his thoughts, emotions and intentions. Feel in his situation and show feelings like joy, enthusiasm, grief, compassion.
5. Siegen - but also can do without
Winner there is always only one. Where a victor, there are always defeated, there are always also one or more losers.
There can be several winners, no losers are needed. Put the fight in the back, so you will be at the forefront of your partner!
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