Devil's circle of self-doubt
I also observe people who are plagued with self-doubt or who simply can not make a decision. These people are usually very sensitive and intelligent.
And then they do not really come to terms with the devil circle in which they find themselves: on the one hand, they can not leave any doubts about themselves or their actions at work or at home. This could be interpreted as a weakness.
On the other hand, however, they clearly feel that something is not going as it was planned. And if you are honest with yourself (and that is difficult enough for most people), you have to admit that the uncomfortable feeling in the stomach area triggers thoughts of doubt in us: "Should I or should I not?"
"Should I or should not I"
This question cannot be answered with a general “yes” or “no”. That would be far too easy. We are part of a social system that influences us and that we can influence ourselves. And that in turn affects our individuality. A person's personality develops from his character, his environment and his experiences.
The addressed social system in which we move consists of several variables that interact with each other. This creates control loops that can swell to disaster, crisis or collapse. But it is also possible that a reaction is completely absent.
Comprehensive system analysis
Therefore, a comprehensive system analysis is recommended. In strategy workshops such analyzes take one to two days, depending on the problem. For such an analysis you should really take your time. The more detailed and detailed it is, the better.
In this case, it is important to invest a great deal of time, especially in terms of time. In retrospect, this commitment will also pay off with a higher quality of life. This is why, as far as possible, an accurate analysis is important because it is the basis for good decisions.
What are "good" decisions?
They serve the benefit of all actors involved in the system. The goal must therefore be to increase the performance of the complete system without maneuvering into a critical state.
A key question that supports decision-making is: Is that still fun to me?
That may sound selfish at first. But whoever looks more closely sees that this question turns out to be altruistic. The thesis, which is behind it, is an extremely simple one: If I am doing well, I can do good to others! Therefore, it is useful to deal with this question and its answers.
Check your system
This question can be used to “check the system” in all areas of life.
- Is there any joy with my private sitution, my home, my home, my relations with my partners, my children and my friends?
- Does my job situation, my workplace, my way to work, my colleagues, my relationships with suppliers, supporters, etc. still make me happy?
At the beginning you may feel overwhelmed with your “personal system analysis” and think: 'But that's a lot of work!' Oh yes, there is actually a lot going on. However, no one has to do this analysis, it is completely voluntary. It's about your career, your job and your life. You have a lot of freedom and can shape your life the way you want.
Spend your life
However, I recommend that you don't always go the supposedly easiest and most convenient way. It will be of great help if you think about “cleaning up” from time to time in your life. You will find that there are aspects of your life that give you pleasure and others that are not. For the latter, you always have two alternatives: “Change it!” or “Leave it!”.
You will benefit from the fact that you always ask yourself the following questions and are absolutely honest when answering them:
- How can I improve the relationship with myself, my family, my friends and fellow human beings as well as to my employees, customers and service providers?
- How can I integrate more joy into my life and how can I make my future more enjoyable overall?
Shaping the future
Many people are afraid of the unknown and therefore often feel the future as a threat. But remember that it is mainly in her hand to make something out of your life. Be curious and open. And you have the courage to change, which is absolutely essential to our valuable treasures of experience that we acquire throughout our lives. And think of Hermann Hesse:
“And in every beginning there is a magic that protects us and helps us to live. The world spirit does not want to bind us and narrow us, it wants to raise us step by step, to widen us. As soon as we are at home in a circle of life and intimately lived, then we are threatened with limp. Only those who are ready to set out and travel can escape paralyzing habituation. "
Concentrate on what pleases you
Focus on what you enjoy (things and / or people); this gives you strength and strength that come from within and boost your self-confidence. This generates a lot of positive energy that you need to master new challenges.
Feel and kindle your passion, your “soul fire”. What do you enjoy? Give in to the urge to do more with your talents and strengths! Go on a journey of discovery and take advantage of opportunities.
Great goals defeat self-doubt
In order for this to succeed and the thesis also applies to you, self-initiative is a good tool to defeat self-doubt and to let even more joy in your life. But that does not happen by itself and not overnight. You have to work for that, often very hard.
It will not always be easy. But if you actually ignite your soul fire and burn for something important in your life, you will be self-active and do everything to reach your goals. And in retrospect, you will realize that this personal goal was your best motivator.
Deal with setbacks
In all euphoria, we must remain realistic. Of course there will also be setbacks that will rob you of the motivation. In the fewest cases everything runs smoothly. There will always be moments when we are far from fun and joy. We've all experienced this several times. In such a phase it depends on the inner attitude:
- Do I want to reach the goal and am I ready to do everything necessary or even more - or I do not want that?
- This is one of the most important decisions that you must make and which determines your further path.
Self-doubts are important. They stimulate thinking. One question you can use to rethink your decision is “Does it make you happy?” Discover discover in yourself what you really enjoy. This will defeat your self-doubts.
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