I do not know what the new job might look like
It looks like this: "I would like to start looking for a new job - but I do not know what it might look like, unfortunately I have no ideas at all - I just know that I prefer my current job today would hang on tomorrow, but as long as I do not know where I want to go, I'll stay where I am right now. " And now?
Only courageous people and those who can no longer stand their situation can terminate their employment without having an alternative in mind (or even a contract of employment in their pockets).
Lack of ideas or no desire to search
The others are looking for - or staying where they are, and explain this with their lack of ideas. They have probably never been seriously looking for alternatives.
This strategy follows an intricately simple logic: "I do not even know which job I like, so I'll leave everything as it is." The possibility that there might well be an interesting activity that one just does not realize is consistently eliminated. But why?
A tunnel without exits
People who have followed a job for a very long time often have no idea what alternatives it can offer them. It then seems to them that the usual job is the only possible - because they have avoided so far, sometimes look beyond their own.
But when things start to get unbearable and it is impossible to imagine keeping the time until retirement in the old way, the situation seems hopeless. Like driving through a tunnel that offers no exits. Then it just remains: "I have to go through it!"
There are alternatives - you just have to know them
Objectively speaking, there are a number of possibilities for each reorienter - better and worse, some are associated with disadvantages, others need training or appear to be difficult to realize at first glance.
If I do not know my alternative yet, it is obvious that I am looking for, research, examine, question, reject, make a closer selection and finally make a decision. This search process requires commitment, time and the courage to deal with new issues.
Confronting one's own borders
Perhaps the most difficult thing to do is to confront one's own limitations: when I deal with an attractive professional idea, I do not miss the question of my competences.
This question is more than unpleasant for many people when their self-image is gapped and negative. So a search process is not exactly a walk - no wonder we meet with resistance!
Faith gives security?
From this point of view, our strategy of "out-of-the-moment hopelessness" makes sense. I would rather stick to my belief that I have no career alternative than to deal with the pitfalls of a search for it.
This also explains the vehemence with which many defend their lack of ideas - not only to themselves, but also to others. Because we often involve other people in order to confirm our internal resistance.
Complaints rather than action
You certainly know people who use every opportunity to complain about their job and then stress that they do not see an alternative for themselves or that there is simply no one.
This statement will probably solve the opposite Impuls to make constructive suggestions and to try to find the right way. One would like to be rewarded with a sentence like: "Yes, that's a great idea, I could really try that, thank you!"
The supporter who confirms the hopelessness
Unfortunately, he will never come when the apparently seeking advice follows the strategy of hopelessness: on the contrary, he will do everything possible to explain every proposal and every puzzle piece of an idea as personally inappropriate and unrealizable. Because he does not really want to hear a good idea, but only in his hopelessness to be strengthened.
The ideal goal of such a conversation is achieved for him if the willing supporter realizes that there is really no alternative for the poor dissatisfied.
The needy who does not want help
In the end, there is usually frustration and sometimes anger, because the helper notices that his opponent does not want to be helped at all. Over such a dynamic, even friendships can easily get into a crisis!
What about you? Do you occasionally invest in energy to tell yourself and others again and again that you do not see a career alternative?
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