10 Reasons to ride a dead horse: 1. The horse is not so dead



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Our brain has a very effective mechanism that is often used when confronted with a fact that is in contradiction with elementary beliefs and needs: it hides them and does not take them into account.

10 Reasons To Ride A Dead Horse: 1. The horse is not that dead 10 Reasons to ride a dead horse: 1. The horse is not that dead

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Here writes for you: Tom Diesbrock is a psychologist, consultant, team developer and book author. Profile

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My horse is not so dead

Overview

One of the typical phrases we say when we try to deny the problems in a situation:

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"My job is okay. Sure, sometimes I'm a bit unmotivated and have not been satisfied for a while. It is a difficult time. But why should I look for another job? No, no, my job is okay. "

The inner and outer signs that tell me that I need to think about job changes are perhaps conflicting with my need for security or my belief that I will never find another job. The solution: I'm not so dissatisfied. My horse is not that dead.

When the inner balance tilts

Overview

This strategy has only one drawback: as my dissatisfaction tends to grow larger than smaller, the pressure to change increases in me. My inner balance between "finally do something!" And "let everything as it is!" Threatens to tip - then I could not stop looking at that I really have a problem.

If, however, I manage to discharge the pressure in a harmless way (as by the overpressure valve of a steam cooker), I could maintain this state until the last day. There are two simple and quite popular solutions: pondering and complaining.

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Overview

Pondering is an extremely unproductive way of thinking. In doing so, I move thoughts, dreams, wishes, ideas like a tough-liquid porridge around in my brain; from left to right and back again.

Everything I have thought of infinitely often - but I do not gain any new aspects, do not penetrate deeper and always come back to the starting point. An internal blockade is solidified by persistent pondering, since no solutions arise because the thought process would have to open up and deal with new aspects.

The ponder has the feeling that his situation is hopeless. But pondering consumes mental energy and diminishes internal pressure. The longer I ponder, the smaller the probability that I will act.

complain

Overview

The complaints could be described as "outward pondering": I keep expressing the same, negative thoughts about my situation. Other people may feel called upon to help me with good advice.

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But since I think by my pondering yes, to know every possible solution, of course, I do not accept anything that could interfere with my ingrained lines of thought. Who complains, does not want to hear that there are ways out! But it reduces pressure.

The ideal strategy to change nothing

Overview

And everything stays as it is because I continue to concentrate on my lousy situation and stick to it, not to be able to change it. A very "effective" strategy.

Do you know people who often complain about their job, but apparently never make an effort to look after a better one? Are you not so sure about your own job? Ask yourself how dead your horse might be? Perhaps you have avoided an honest answer to this question so far?

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