What would our lives be without excuses?
The meeting lasted just a little longer. A traffic jam prevented arriving on time. Claims of this kind go over most of us quickly and without a bad conscience. They say more easily than the honest confession that a small colleague would join, or just leave too late.
The truth is a little bent. Everything fits. Consequences are hardly to be feared. Mostly not even if our opponent knows that it was just an excuse. Excuses have always been a tacitly accepted behavior in our society.
Reasons for excuses
Our human nature strives for harmony. With the appropriate excuse, a possible conflict, even if it is so small, can be avoided. Negative circumstances are glossed over, disguised or concealed, so that we do not lose our face, do not have to admit mistakes or assume responsibility.
With excuses we try to put our self-image in the right light, to appear as we would like to be and to be perceived.
Fear of rejection
The fear of rejection also plays a role. Who admits a mistake, has made this yes. If this violation of the norm can not be undone, at least extenuating circumstances must be created.
The unpleasant fact or situation is spoiled with imagination and creativity. Half-truths or inaccurate arguments are sought, found, presented, and believed-and finally by ourselves.
Excuses disguise priorities
One of the most used excuses is the statement "I don't have time for that" - which is often synonymous with 'not taking time for something' because it is not important to me. Conversely, this means: If I really want to do something, I also find the time.
It is up to everyone to arrange them accordingly. This, however, presupposes knowing or finding out what you really want. Then priorities can be set and changes can be implemented.
No time gain
Everything will be different tomorrow. Attention! The next excuse is already waiting for their use. Postponing to tomorrow will easily push forward.
And certainly there are enough reasons why this must be so. Time is not gained by this, but opportunities are lost by inactivity.
Excuses for fear of change
Although we suffer from it, we quickly find ourselves with unsatisfying facts and justify why we are suffering. With this attitude, we are not facing the problem and are also looking for no solution. Whining is convenient.
To change things or states is to become active, change habits. But who guarantees that this change will actually bring the hoped for improvement?
Excuses are obstacles
Slightly sneaks back into excuses, the reasons why this can work with others but never with one itself.
It is overlooked that the envied happiness of her colleague is based on hard work, her own chances were indeed recognized, but the courage to use them was missing. Excuses are a real hindrance.
Why chocolate is a vegetable
Chocolate is extracted from the beans of cocoa smoke. Beans are vegetables. Sugar is extracted from sugar beet. Beets are vegetables. So chocolate is a vegetable. For fear of consequences, we lie again and again, instead of seeing the facts in the eye.
Excuses make many (seemingly) easier, but they are usually the false truth. Even if the true truth is sometimes painful, it is the only way to grow as a personality.
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German edition: ISBN 9783965962767
English version: ISBN 9783965962774 (Translation notice)
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