From the author:
10. Do not laugh about my fears. They are terrifyingly real. But you can help me by trying to take me seriously.
I have an employee who is more of a lone-driving instructor. A young man, not even thirty. And with him I have the impression that colleagues often do not take him so seriously. They see him as an outsider.
Fears are human
From my point of view, this employee has many problems: He has not grown up like most children. He does not know his parents and has grown up in the home. You notice that.
He has an extreme ambition to be a good driving instructor. He works hard on it. He is the only one who even studies - a psychology study, by the way. He always has bombsides, as he can get even better in his job.
How to destroy your own success
On the other hand, he often tears the tower he has built up himself by repeatedly shooting across. But one can not say: "You are a complete idiot, get lost."
Because he has huge fears and you have to understand. You also have to think in detail into a person like this. And then you can help him and tell him, "You build super towers and rip them up with your ass. It would be much better if in the future we only build towers that will stop! "
To take anxieties seriously
Because he can. He builds up much more good than destroying things. I see the good in him. And I take his fears very seriously. It is important to me that one is concerned about the fears of its employees.
And they are very different. And maybe then the boss says: "I have fears myself, how should I still worry about the fears of my employees?" Then sometimes the boss should talk about his fears.
Even bosses are just people
He can, for example, in Team say: "Gee folks, I'm scared all day that customers are not paying my bills." Then the boss is just human.
As a boss we want - and should - we always be the figurehead. But we are all human. The boss does not have to be the one who can not be kicked off the pedestal.
As fears show
Employees also understand these fears. And they also have good ideas on how to solve one or the other problem. Everyone can be authentic and carry these fears outwards. For example, I talk permanently.
Then the others can help me. Of course, I also talk about the things I'm not afraid of. I do not want to be a damn.
You have to talk about fears
But still: to have fear is normal and to pronounce it all ahead. And when someone says to a child, perhaps even laughing:
"Oh come on, you do not have to be afraid", then this does not help anyone. When I'm scared, I'm scared. Point.
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