Who is sovereign?
One of them tries a sovereign appearance through arrogant fussing and gesticulating; the other wants to impress with as many foreign words as possible in one sentence. Still others behave rather quietly and restrainedly, but have an answer to every question. What is now sovereign?
According to Duden, sovereignty means “to be able to cope with any situation”, but who is that? Not even the chancellor! Many people consider themselves sovereign, but whether they really are can only be seen in critical situations. Because you can't pretend charisma and self-confidence. But you can practice it.
Ethymology - where does the term “sovereign” come from
The meaning definition becomes exciting when we look at the ethymological meaning of the term:
The noun sovereignty derives from the French sovereignty, the French term comes from the Central Latin superanus and means something like "above" or "superior".
8 tips to keep track of everything in life
Be superior. But not at any price: According to Prof. Dr. Frick, Zurich developmental psychologist, sovereign people exude a certain independence and mental independence, especially when it is critical.
The projector falls out during the presentation, the computer crashes with unprotected data, or the caffeedurstigen Schwiegger parents are unannounced at the door (of course, the coffee is empty!).
1. Be sovereign, even if I do not feel like it
And yet they keep an overview even in such situations, keep calm, defuse the situation and "pull themselves together".
They stay sober instead of hectic, they seek solutions instead of guilty ones, they are humorous instead of guilty. By the way, that works, too, if you're not in such a good mood.
2. Be sovereign like a politician
In this respect one can cut off from many politicians a slice: Under sovereignty one understands not in vain in the jurisprudence the ability of a natural or legal person to exclusive legal self-determination.
Even in Germany, sovereignty is important, especially in Germany: Federalism, which was enshrined in the Basic Law in Germany, grants our 16 states a high degree of statehood.
3. Sovereign is a healthy self-confidence
But back to the topic: Although arrogance and arrogance seem intimidatingly sovereign to many people, these qualities have nothing to do with real sovereignty, on the contrary:
It is sovereign who has a healthy self-confidence and is neither arrogant nor overbearing enough to know and know a lot. Sovereignty is an outward expression of the inner attitude. Therefore, you should always ask yourself: How do I get over?
4. Sovereignty comes from within
Sovereign are often not the conspicuous people who rattle the loudest, wheel and throw confetti, have money for the fastest car and the smartest suit and apparently just have one thing to do: make a career.
The most ardent people in the highest positions are often small in difficult situations. Problems are passed on to others and should be solved by them. Big flap, nothing behind it. And then it becomes clear that sovereignty comes from within.
5. Control feelings in stress situations
Incidentally, it is often, but by no means only women, that makes you feel insecure and not very self-confident. So I wrote a lot about it Just how women can make themselves stronger: Just talk to one another!
Does the Chef a huge stain on the tie and the boss a monstrous run in stocking, both can not just blow off the next appointment. You still have to be sovereign!
6. Focus and control
And that's pretty simple: focus and control your emotions in stressful situations, collect positive thoughts against tricky situations, and keep you in a good mood, even if you are not.
The principle: “pretend”. It doesn't matter how bad your mood is, your goal must be: Nobody notices. Manage your emotions and thoughts very easily yourself.
7. Use emotions positively
Elsewhere I have described quite extensively, why feelings sometimes get in the way of business life - eg also and especially in important negotiations and how we can still use them positively.
Because: Do not you sometimes wonder why your boss rather hires the tough blonde than the much smarter gray mouse? Dear the overbearing suit, as the ambitious glasses wearer Why is that?
8. Success is effect
The answer is simple: because it's no longer intelligence and competence that counts, it's impact! Success is effect - sounds sad, but it is.
But what if you are not blessed with natural beauty and a healthy self-awareness? If the impassioned lecture of the colleagues not only lifts the boss, but also ourselves from the slippers?
We start from the worst
We should first ask ourselves the question: Why are we even weak in certain situations, and why do we let our soft knees and unsteady stuttering show when all eyes are on us?
Because we imagine the worst from the start: “I can't do that, it will go wrong, I don't want to do it now”… Why don't we just talk the other way around?
You will be treated like you are
Because as you give yourself, you will also be treated: "Behave like the boss and you will be treated like the boss" - very simple. And for that, nobody has to be in a good mood and in a good mood. A firm handshake, a nice smile, a clear pronunciation - everyone can, definitely.
Sure, bad mood, a bad feeling, you can easily see. But also feelings you can train, regularly, effectively! So you can gradually learn how to consciously recall your wishful feeling - at any time.
The whole thing has the nice name "successive approximation" and is easier than it sounds: remember your last successful appearance. Was it the last rehearsal presentation before your partner or your last groomsman speech?
And then you ask yourself, "Why did you feel sovereign? What did you think and feel then? What did the good mood do to you? What did you feel after the successful performance? Review these situations - step by step!
8 tips for sovereign impact: Do it anyway!
Even if you are motivated by the pressure to perform and the fear of failure, you still do it. Bite your teeth!
For in business and also otherwise applies: A played well laaunter appearance acts more competent and above all sovereign, as a truly uncertain. 8 tips!
1. Overcome blind spots in our behavior
Quite simply: both know nothing about it. This self- / foreign-image unconformity means: one does not act as one believes. This is due to our blind spots.
Everyone has them, but very few people know them. These are personal idiosyncrasies that you don't even notice. “Unfortunately”, “unfortunately”, “it is a pity”, “went stupid” or “unfortunately” are all too often used in our language.
2. To perceive and improve the mood in the words
But it is not just our words that others take against us and weaken our effect. The articulation tendencies, the deeper mood behind the words, are much stronger than words.
We often no longer perceive this mood because it seems so natural to us. Our environment could understand our undertones as disturbing, as criticism, nagging, wailing: “He always complains”, “It constantly improves you”, “He's just howling around”.
3. Accept criticism, even if it hurts
We are passively exposed to our blind spot, unless you give us feedback. Listen to feedback from your colleagues, your partners, and take it seriously. Even if that can be unpleasant.
Of course, if we are in a bad mood, unwanted articulation tendencies are more likely to develop, faster and more frequently - even and especially when we neither want nor are able to perceive this ourselves. We unintentionally torpedo our effect.
4. Practice self-reflection Step by step, you will be free of any jolts
In order to prevent this, you need a good self-reflection and a lot of feedback - so you will be gradually free of maroons. Only through feedback from others do you recognize your behavioral effects:
If this is done, then it will work arrogant, if you do that, it will be self-assured. This information will allow you to vary your behavior until the desired effect occurs.
5. Practice feedback, but right: you know that too ...
You know this too: A nice colleague asks you for his first lecture after your opinion on his performance. He does not seem to notice much of his verses.
Do not you want to help him, too? Would not you be able to help you with this kind of feedback?
6. Do not justify - who justifies complains
So be grateful for any feedback you get and do something with it. Above all: do not justify yourself for weaknesses that are reported to you. Justification or resistance are “feedback killers”.
“Qui s'excuse, s'accuse”, the French say: “Whoever justifies himself accuses himself.”
7. Make the most of every situation
You always have to decide whether the glass is half full or half empty. That sounds easy - and is it! The solution to many problems: Simply make the best of every situation.
Because as the saying goes: "If life gives you a lemon, make lemonade out of it". And in hardship cases: ask for salt and tequila! The goal is to have a sovereign effect, the question remains at the end: How do I work now?
8. Feel the fear and do it anyway
So: Visualize your desire! Stick to it and train your feelings and thoughts. So you can stay in stressful and delicate situations, because you can determine what you think and feel and how confident you are.
Stop giving up on deadlines for failure or performance pressure and thus miss the chance to present yourself: Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Conclusion: shine with sovereignty even in delicate situations
Such experiences only intimidate us more, we feel insecure, inexperienced, incompetent and helpless. How can the guy in the suit in the front just talk like that? Nobody even understands a word. Why does the nervous lady pluck at your dress all the time during your presentation?
You want to cancel the important appointment because you feel very bad and unprepared? It is quite easy, even in tricky situations with a successful appearance to shine - even if you have zero buck on it. The 16 tips above have shown you how to do it! And now it's your turn to do that.
Text as PDF, book or eCourse on the topic or personal advice
Offline download: Download this text as PDF - Read usage rights, Because we do not automatically submit the title of this text for privacy reasons: When buying in "interests" the title register if support is needed. After buying text exclusively Download at this URL (please save). Or for a little more directly an entire book or eCourse with this text buy, read on.
Book on the topic with discount: This text is also available in book form and you can buy the title here in two languages. You can also preview the book first look at and then purchase directly on the book page with a 20 percent member discount.
German edition: ISBN 9783965960244
English version: ISBN 9783965960251 (Translation notice)
Your eCourse on Demand: Choose your personal eCourse on this or another desired topic, As a PDF download. Up to 30 lessons with each 4 learning task + final lesson. Please enter the title under "interests". Alternatively, we are happy to put together your course for you or offer you a personal regular eMailCourse including supervision and certificate - all further information!
Consultant packages: You want to increase your reach or address applicants as an employer? For these and other topics we offer special Consultant packages (overview) - For example, a personal phone call (price is per hour).