Sympathy for the think-tank
As soon as two strange people meet for the first time, a sympathy test is unconsciously carried out. Within a matter of seconds, thought-books are opened:
Either sympathetic or unsympathetic and thus automatically the generalization in competent or incompetent. This evaluation reflex is based on the human primal instincts that our early ancestors needed to survive.
Friend or foe?
When people who were fiercely at that time met, people had to decide immediately whether they were a friend or a foe - with the corresponding consequences such as attack or flight.
If two strange people meet each other today, the first impression is very quickly shaped by the expression of the body (such as body posture, facial expression, gesture) and clothing. Or on the phone, for example, by the voice itself, as well as the first words.
The fear of rejection
The fear of rejection keeps many people from seeking contact with other people. For the following reasons:
- What is to be said of cleverness?
- How should we react if the person who is addressed reacts differently than desired?
- What do the others think when they see that you are looking for a stranger?
Often something new
It is quite common for two colleagues to go to a congress or a seminar, sit side by side - and in the evening on the way home, they have not even met a new person, but actually have only remained together.
Some may argue that he is not afraid to address strangers at events. Who likes to admit that he is afraid? Often one speaks to this inability to have inhibitions in the speech, beautiful, for example, "The response of strangers is simply not me!" Or "I do not even need to address others!".
Inhibitions are expensive!
Especially in the business world, inhibitions are the most expensive thing there is. For while one unobtrusively speaks to many people and "networks", another one, who may even be even more interesting, remains below his potential because he remains alone or always in the same circles.
But people now buy from people. And customers can only buy from those who know them, or at least recommend them.
People buy from people
As a rule, a person is very uncomfortable with strangers, for example, if he wants to sell something to others in the break talks. That's why it's elemental, not with the attitude "I want to sell something - let's see who I can do something today!" To go to events, but with the mindset "Let's see what 5 interesting people I'll get to know today."
On the one hand, in the latter variant, the goal is clearly appreciative of strangers, and on the other hand set with 5. If you make a few more contacts, you do not run the risk of "sticking" to the whole event the first time, but maybe after a few minutes, or in the next break, you can talk to another stranger.
Find common ground
The speech is very easy to succeed if one discusses commonalities. For example, "How did you like the last lecture?" Or "And, could you take some of the event with you?".
It is also conceivable the walk to a bar table, in which only (still) strangers frolicking, with the sentence "Hello, can I introduce myself?" But also the response of other people in the event rooms, for example, in the canteen or on the Because of or to the toilet or the parking lot are conceivable.
Talking is silver, listening is gold!
It is important to let the conversation partner talk - and not to play too much into the foreground. People like to talk about themselves, or about others. The more you listen to your conversation partner seriously and interested, the more comfortable it will feel.
And as soon as the conversation comes to an end, the exchange of business cards can definitely be addressed offensively: If someone in the round reaches for his business cards with the words "What do you think of when we exchange business cards for a second?" then, all too often, others acknowledge this to others.
Later in the office, there is more to research about the person: Can you network with them, for example via XING or LinkedIn? Are there any professional links to discuss them in a telephone call?
If, therefore, the telephone conversation is made following the personal conversation, the conversation is significantly easier. For now there are first similarities, namely the entertainment at the event. This means that the person who is called is more likely to be much more interested and sympathetic.
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