What are game spoilers?
Everyone knows whiners and spoilsport - and nobody wants to have anything to do with them. These are the people who are attracted by constant criticism and nagging unpleasant, or at least can annoy pretty, right?
Yes and no. Often one is inclined at the first moment, coworkers or also humans in the own Facebook Timeline as Nörgler abun. If one then gets closer to one or the other problem, one realizes that the nagging is perhaps not at all unjustified.
However, one must distinguish between nerds who nag out of sheer lust for nagging (or out of frustration?) And those who only express their opinions, for example because they believe that something is wrong Company or to move in society.
The sound makes the music
So you can turn very different people into complainers - and it is not only your own motivation that is decisive, but also how others perceive you.
Paradoxically, unpleasant nagging usually results when one is afraid to be uncomfortable with its criticism.
Especially when it seems important what other people think, one tends to express his criticism much more expressively or only half-heartedly to say "yes" to a thing, although one actually means "no". Because the other one could have a bad picture!
Not even close! Studies show that other people are respecting people who stand by their statements - if they are fair and give a good justification for their attitude.
Therefore: Practicing criticism in a timely and friendly manner is always better than always saying “yes” or - worse - losing patience at some point and suddenly blurting out the criticism.
6 tips for better nagging
But sometimes nagging can also point out perspectives, give food for thought and actually improve something. Only Nörgler should observe a few rules of the game - otherwise they are very fast as a spoilsport and fly out:
- Don't complain hidden. If you have anything to criticize, say it openly and factually, but without being offensive. So not something like: "Actually you could ..." - the other person doesn't understand that and then gets angry about what you really meant ... "
- Get straight to the point, avoid small-talk, because that is ambiguous and dishonest.
- Be sure to talk alone with the person in question so that they do not appear in front of others.
- Do not blasphemy on others - that always comes out and gives only bad blood.
- Avoid allegations and generalizations like “Why do you have to immer: only ... ”, but remain factual.
- Signal your good intentions. Offer approaches to solving the problem. This shows an honest interest in the person / thing and that you have kept thinking.
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