How women in leadership fail: Do good and talk about it


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Performance is about how women and men bring their success “to the man” or “to the woman”. That is what sets them apart from men.

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Cristina Muderlak cristina_murderlakCristina Muderlak Director of the Institute DIALOGUE - Coaching and Voice.

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Men talk about their competences

It is not uncommon for men to find it much easier to talk about their skills and to demand appropriate recognition as a matter of course. In any case, I know a lot more men than women who sometimes "knock it down" and advertise their performance verbally and in body language as a great achievement.

They are often successful and gain a lot of admiration. Others later remember them and, if necessary, come back to them as “specialists” on the subject.

The Chef must see what I do!

In contrast, Paulina's lawsuit is not an isolated case from among my customers. The participants of a “High Potential” career workshop had worked out their personal skills during the day, should now visualize them and formulate goals with the next steps required.

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Then it was the turn of Paulina, a graduate of an English elite university and a physicist in a demanding corporation for 3½ years. She had built up a lot of anger over time, and she was glad to vent him. She scolded:

“For a long time I have had the feeling that I am literally standing still and that I am simply not making any progress in terms of my career. But my male colleagues are easily preferred to me, just because they are constantly 'boasting' about what they are doing and bragging about it to Hinz and Kunz. They treat every little thing as if they have raised something huge! I was always very good at school and university and got the appropriate grades for it. Now I'm getting just as good results, but can try as hard as I want - nobody notices it, unless I trumpet it around loudly! I just can't and won't accept that my boss doesn't see it for himself. It can't be that I have to rub everything under his nose again, which I've done so well. He's also my boss, so that he can see what I'm doing ?! "

Women must overcome more inhibitions

Paulina even questioned the society in which one needed elbows and in which one was more pre-emptied with hitting and stabbing than with constant good performance. Thereupon a lively discussion broke loose, in which once again it became clear that women must overcome much more inhibitions, if they should or should talk about their actions.

Some of the more experienced women, like most of the men in the group, said clearly how important it was to talk about themselves in order to be included in the ranks of the “high potentials”.

Working with the boss when communicating

The women also described that it was “a real learning process for them”. The most helpful thing was the realization that the boss was simply dependent on the employees “working” for him in this too.

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In other words, you have to tell the boss what you are doing. He had enough to do with the overall project and his superiors, which would make him lose sight of the individual.


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German edition: ISBN 9783965960909

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English version: ISBN 9783965960916 (Translation notice)

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