The shock of failure
First, failures are usually a shock. The ability to handle it positively, to get up again and carry on is called resilience, Out of it comes unimagined productivity. Recently, I read an ingenious quote from the Irish writer and Nobel laureate Samuel Beckett (1906 - 1989):
“Always tried. Always failed. Never mind. Try again. Fail again. Fail better. ”
He got to the point what I have repeatedly addressed in my books and texts: that it is not a problem to fail. But that afterwards you should get up again and better carry on - even if you run the risk of failing again. Or to put it another way: you always learn something.
Getting up again: what makes resilience?
The psychologist and Best of HR – Berufebilder.de®Author Denis Mourlane, one of the leading German resilience experts, describes the phenomenon in his book “Resilience: The Undiscovered Ability of the Really Successful” The example of Steve Jobs, who left 1985 because of internal power struggles Apple, 1996 but again as a consultant, member of the Board and CEO returned. Resilient people are characterized by the following abilities according to Mourlane:
- The ability to control emotions
- impulse control
- The ability to make the right causal conclusions
- Empathy for the feelings of others
- Realistic optimism
- The ability to keep track of your own goals
But what does that have to do with productivity? Quite simply, those who are resilient can not only cope with setbacks better, but can pick themselves up and carry on their work faster. It not only saves nerves, but also precious time.
How to become resilient
But resilience is not just a skill you have or do not have: you can even learn and train resilience. And many executives are particularly resilient. Resilience is therefore a skill that contributes significantly to our personal success. But how can she learn now?
For example, by training a positive point of view and seeing things calm. Networking and connecting with other people. Changes and things that we can not change are accepted. Sees crises as opportunities. At the same time recognizing your own limits.
Resilient: When emotions get in the way
This is often easier said than done, because often enough, our emotions are thwarting our calculations. How to handle it?
What, for example, helps to find peace and center, is meditation - something that I have not yet tried myself, but which many people have called me a method with many positive aspects. Writing down thoughts and problems helps. Or simply exercise regularly and pay attention to a balanced diet.
Brene Brown is investigating interpersonal behavior
Brene Brown is Professorin at the University of Houston. But actually she is much more: Namely storyteller, as she often notes in her lectures self-deprecating.
At the Graduate College for Social Work she conducts research on interpersonal connections and explores our abilities for empathy, belonging and love. The last ten years she has spent researching a concept that she has wholeheartedness lists.
Research journey into one's inner life
A speech from her at the TEDxHouston appealed to me very much - she not only talks soberly about her research results, but also reveals in a very self-ironic way deep insights into her own inner life - and how alleged weaknesses turn into advantages.
As a result of her research, Brown went on a personal, spiritual journey to get to know herself better, but also to better understand other people.
The key to success: Vulnerability
Your research result: The key to a successful, good life is to allow your own vulnerability, including negative emotions and the overcoming of shame.
Through years of observation, she has found that people who successfully and successfully master life are usually the ones who can deal calmly with their emotions and also handle negative events well.
To meet life with dignity and authenticity
And that these very people are the ones who stand by their own vulnerability and can accept it. In other words, who wants to be successful, must also know his weaknesses.
Brown also addresses questions that I find extremely important:
- How can we engage in dignity and authenticity in our lives?
- How do we keep the courage and compassion to embrace our imperfection and to realize that we are good enough?
- And how do we recognize that we are lovable and valuable?
Exciting topic, exciting talk!
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