Like a counter-charm
An example is a wailing whine of your partner or your partner. First, be aware that there is a subtle way of control that you can consciously accept or reject.
This becomes particularly difficult when, for example, tears are the "usual" means of choice to appeal to your helpfulness and pliability. Here as well, in the sense of quick-wittedness and distance-creating, the separation of information and emotion helps.
Who's crying is not right
You will soon realize that tears are just an expression of momentary emotions and, at best, a statement of emotional concern that can be different for any other person in the same situation.
Tears do not say anything about whether someone is right and therefore basically a claim to our support.
Use inverse logic
You can also use this kind of inverse logic in your work and react completely differently than expected. Ask yourself:
- What did the other actually say?
- Is there any interruption that you have just found impertinent?
- Is there a part that you might even agree with?
Agree instead of annoy
Praise this part, ignore the rest, and then continue your own argumentation
"Exactly Mr. Maier, at point X we agree. Now let us turn to the things that we should also consider and complete the picture. "
The art of not reacting
The goal of this exercise is to break away from the supposed obligation to emotionally respond to the behavior of others. Federal Chancellor Angelika Merkel is a true master in the art of acting responsively by non-reacting and thus initiating political decisions.
Their seeming idleness is one of the classic themes of every contemporary political cabaret artist. Not bad for a person who has been described as the most powerful woman in the world for years.
Take time for the reaction
Angela Merkel leaves media representatives and political opponents to the left, no matter how loudly they demand a statement from the Chancellor. It rather postpones, rather than spontaneously make a directional decision, bypassing the possible traps of your opponents. The Chancellor takes time to set her reactions, and she acts sovereign.
Even in talkshows, you can admire the art of not responding as a form of quickness. The fact that politicians simply ignore a question or an attack from a counterparty is no accident, but a conscious strategy.
A strategy that works
And the apparent non-reaction as a strategy works! It shows the opponent how the balance of power is distributed: Whoever answers every question, is deeper in the hierarchy than the skillful silence.
A zero reaction shows that you can not predict the course of the conversation. If you want to be more playful in such situations, then you can still participate in the conversation with interest and benevolent silence, without having to react to the obstinacy of your opponents. Maybe you really do not want that.
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